the parent trap

January 11, 2006 at 6:37 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Song of the Moment: Proud by Heather Small
To Do (tasks, not people): get back to work mode
Current State: craving

at some point you will have to learn to detach yourself from the situation. know what you can do and know where to stop, i tell her. if nothing you do pleases them, then let it be. don’t let them make you feel bad about yourself.

but she’s tired. and i can tell by the sound of her voice that she’s fed up with the old folks at home.

what was it that gibran once said about your kids not being your kids, blah blah blah? in guess who’s coming to dinner, dr. john prentice has a heated conversation with his dad who disapproves of his marriage. and he says, when the tone gets to the point that his dad begins telling him he owes him (to paraphrase): ‘however you brought me up and everything you did for me, you owed me because you brought me into this world.’

and true. if we ever find ourselves looking after older people, let it be because we really do care about them and not out of a sense of entitlement. not out of a feeling that they own us and we owe them. children are not investments, as she sharply points out.

the stress of providing is not an alien topic for me as well, but i am thankful that at least my mom is not treating me like a piece of property. it makes it a more welcome responsibility. for others like me, well i don’t know because i don’t know a lot of people like that. but as far as she is concerned, i do believe that someday she’ll get out of it. i hope so.


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