a revelation at the fair

February 21, 2005 at 8:56 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

so there we were, tune and i, having fun at saturday’s diliman fair. we had just gotten off the ferris wheel where i spent the first minute hanging on to my pants for fear of falling off the rickety seats we were on, until i got the hang of it and actually enjoyed the breeze against my face, my arms and my body as we zoomed up backwards and fell forward in circles again and again.

we decided if we could do the ferris wheel, we could conquer the wall climb and so dashed off to go there and sign up with nary a thought runing in our heads but just to jack up our thrill.

i went barefoot. i wasn’t even thinking that the wall was actually THAT high. apparently it was about a hundred feet up, but i didn’t care. i just wanted to get to the top. more than halfway through i gave up.

my fet were getting tired, my knees were shaking and my head felt whoozy. i hadn’t exactly been feeling well, but nevertheless it was no excuse.

but the funny thing is, when i yelled “down!” i was told to hang on to the rope and let go.

and i couldn’t.

‘let go sir, you won’t fall down, trust me!’ i heard the guy holding my line yell at me a couple of times.

but i didn’t.

‘i think i’ll just climb down’ i said, and started to descend, footing my way down. then i heard the guy say ‘let go’ again a couple more of times, but i didn’t.

until i realized climbing down wouldn’t be as easy as getting up, so i held on to the rope with my right hand, but kept clinging onto the wall with my left.

‘let go!’ i heard the mountaineers say again.

at that point i was irritated.

‘you won’t be there when i fall! i can’t! i can’t! i can’t!’ i said to myself in my head.

‘let go vincent! you can do it, they’ll catch you!’ i heard tune say from behind me.

fatigue got the better of me. i let my left hand go and leaned back against the wall and descended quick.

in no time i was on the ground.

although we laughed about it afterwards, in the back of my head i was thinking why i couldn’t let go.

it was so easy, actually. all i had to do was hang on to the rope and free fall.

obviously i have trust issues. yikes.

so what am i to do? go on another wall-climbing session, of course.


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